Mesmerizing rain...

As I sat at a friend's house...fiddling my time away sitting in front of the computer, it is at that instance that I hear a rumble. A bit surprised, I look out the window through the checkered blinds and I see the sky darkerning and a grayness engulfing the blueness. The blueness disappearing with the grey and their mingling like they were meant to be.

I stared at the first drops of rain that were starting to fall...drop by drop...coloring the dullness around...I wanted to get wet in the rain and I was so tempted to just run out and simply walk in the rain...and feel...just feel...

I stared at the rain till my eyes fogged...and I realized the beautiful weather that was inevitable...the weather I enjoy the most...the sensations I crave for most...

So finally, I stepped out in the rain...I kicked away my sandals...ran out with the flowy trail of my skirt and savored each moment.

I felt the first drop of rain touch my forehead and slide down to my cheek...I wiped it off smiling. The second drop of my rain touched my lips...I licked it off...the cold droplet sliding in my mouth felt so heavenly...
As soon as I did that, the rain's pace quickened...more droplets everywhere...I ran towards the grass...and stepped in the grass...felt my feet getting wet...wiggled my toes and my feet attracted a few green leafy blades...My skin turned translucent...and I could just feel myself glowing...I felt my pulse quicken...I looked around...here...there just to take in the view and picture myself like this forvever...

My hair was straight before I had my little guilty pleasure, and well...as I felt the wind blow my hair...over my face...and all around...I looked up..felt the rain trickle all over my face....
I felt my wet hair...curling around my face as each rain drop touched a flying strand...
I just felt so free...like a young girl walking on green cliffs and admiring the natural beauty beneath...

The beauty that is in simple rain is unmatched by any other pleasure...the romantic thoughts that are evoked by the rain are simply divine...

As I walked back into the house and looked at myself in the mirror, I realized the reflection that stared back at me transformed within a matter of minutes. The girl who ran out in the rain was a bit morose and tempted to break free...but the lady who came back was someone whose hair was wild and flying, her skirt drenched, her eyes twinkling, her body shimmering with natural water, and her face flushed...and a sign of contentment was settled on her face...

The effect of a such a natural...yet such a mesmerizing phenomenon...RAIN! (Applicable to Me only!) ;)

A theory about love...

I always wondered what love is:

I think I have come up with a reasonable explanation of how you can know when you are in love. It involves going through 5 questions and these questions will assess your feelings for your significant other.

So when you might be unsure, ask yourself:

1) Do I like him/her just as an individual?

2) Do I admire the qualities that I see in him/her?

3) Do I respect him/her and his/her opinions?

4) Do I see reason in his/her mistakes?

5) Do I want him/her? (Wanting as in really really wanting him or her)

So, ask yourselves these 5 questions...I bet you have felt atleast one of them at one point and time...and I thought these questions don't mean that much. You might have felt one of these feelings for someone but feeling ALL FIVE is an altogether different case. I started thinking about myself and whether I have felt all FIVE...no I have not (Well maybe! ;))...it is very hard to want someone and also admire and respect them to such a deep extent. First of all, admiring someone is quite a rare thing...and even respect doesn't just drop from the sky...it takes time and devotion...wanting happens only when you are so attracted to the other...and forgiving someone's mistakes and seeing reason in their mistakes rarely happens...it might happen occasionally with friend...but not with that many people...and you might forgive but actually seeing reason is usually hard. But when you do see reason...that would really mean something!
So next time you think you are in love...have this checklist ready and try it out...
See if it works...if it does...let me know!!! I will patent it!!! ;)

Why do I feel this...?

I wonder why I feel like I am lacking something in my life. Everyday and every night, I always feel like I am missing something. What can it be? What could it be?
Why is this happening to me?
I have always been a happy person, and I still am yet I feel compelled to think about issues I never have before.
Maybe that is the problem, we all take refuge in being busy and that is how we avoid assessing our inner peace and and state.
That is what I did even without realizing it and still people do it all around me.
But since I have been to college, I have had time to think and ponder about myself...and I have discovered that there is something missing.
I don't know what it is. It is not the need for someone. It is simply a need to do something. Maybe a sense of adventure or thrill, just something out of the ordinary...something that will take me away from this monotonous life.
I have never said such depressing things or even thought of being depressed and I am not...yet there is something lacking.
It is not enough to have a job and to be a volunteer...there needs to be something else...there has to be...what can it be?
Maybe everyone passes through this stage...and I have always been a thinker and I am still thinking...but what can it be?
I know I can put on a mask or hide by being busy, but maybe I don't want to...yes...I don't want to because I want to go to the core of the issue and know why I feel this way.
This led to me think that will I ever be satisfied in a such a monotonous life. I see my parents...what does their life consist of? Going to work, coming back, cooking or doing some house chores and then sleeping and the cycle is repetitive with the exception of weekends where they will socialize but then again...mostly with the same people.

I don't know what I want.

I thought I wanted the success and the career, which I still do but money is not that important. It is important enough for me to pursue a degree but materialistic things like a city life and lavish lifestyle...don't matter anymore...maybe there is something more worthwhile in store. I do hope there is.
I am lacking nothing in life...in fact these days...I have no tension about anything yet I feel like I am lacking something.
Maybe I do thrive when I am tense, busy, and always running from here to there...and that is how I was in high school...never had time...literally never had time!

I hope this feeling dissolves on its own as I start working while pursuing other ambitions...
I know students my age don't really think about such things...I know my friends don't and very few people and if they do...those friends are quite older then why am I hitting these feelings right now? Why can't put them back and just have *FUN*...maybe there is a price for upholding all the morals and principles that I do...and maybe the price is this feeling...!

Just a year ago, the home I am in right now was my sweet little home...my little refuge and my haven of privacy...but now it seems like a constraint maybe even a restricted area where I am subjected to...

I wish I could just get up and go without answering any questions to anyone...get up and go on a journey of my own...be spontaneous and let life take me where it can...and I could just experience the world like that...

Hmm...I do wonder...! Expression is a strong thing...I have really come to respect the people who do express and I suppose this is my way of expressing myself!
Am I getting ***OLD***? OH NO!!!

Maybe become an airhostess for a year and just fly all around and see what I want to...maybe it is all about how the grass seems greener on the other side...!