I have experienced this quite a few times and wonder why people are so offensive about other people's success. It is like professionals don't want to work themselves, but if someone does decide to take the bulk of the work, they instantly have to comment on that person as to why the other person is doing that work. I had a similar experience where I work and since I conduct workshops...I signed for about 8 and then as the sheet went around for the others to sign-up...3-4 girls commented about how much I had signed up. Initially, I thought if I could possibly be hogging the workshops but the point was that every workshop has two presenters so anyone could sign up besides me. Especially these two co-workers, one of them actually graduating this december was talking to another and kind of giggling and directly looking at me in terms of my workshops...and that was the height of unprofessionalism. Sometimes, women can be b***hy and some of them almost all the time...and one of them being her...
I have always maintained a professional air, yet a senior has the audacity to do that...obviously I believe I am better than that so I didn't really react, but it makes me reflect on what the professional world becomes eventually?
Why are people forced to choose between better professional relationships or competing with their co-workers to get ahead? And why should they choose since it is all about teamwork? Even though these people did not sign up for any workshops regardless, they had to make a comment. I suppose it is human nature to be competitive and defensive as soon as they realize that someone else could possibly be a threat...but the point is that there is no threat in this job since everyone has a secure position and will continue to do so.
Maybe I shouldn't be bothered by such things, but still it forces me to think that the world I am so eager to enter will be like this but with the ten times the intensity...yet we all want to be part of this world where anger erupts because of absolute no reason, or when someone is singled out just beacause they have the daring to be competitive and not be a sheep follower but a star follower, or when frustration is taken out on someone who had nothing to do with their original problems.
Similarly, my friend sitting right next to me was so open about it and said that we actually need people to fill the spots so it is okay if I am taking those many workshops...maybe the difference between men and women...
Anyhow, this particular lady explicitly stated that "Oh, you are signed up for 8 workshops," and I simply said, "Yes, I know." End of topic and no further discussion. I don't need to justify my decisions to my co-workers because they are my equals and today I realized that maybe they are not even my equals if they have that kind of unprofessional air about them and their persona. If my boss had asked a similar question, I would be totally agreeable and go on and explain...
Honestly, what happens to people? They change so fast...and are so fast to make remarks. How come I usually try to think and be considerate of others' feelings while other people just go on without any heed...? Maybe that is the difference, and I realize maybe just maybe because I have compassion or maybe I am just a fool and possibly too nice since I have heard that from a lot of people (the nice part, not the fool!)
Anyways...so this is my little personal experience and I wonder...and that particular woman who looked at me and giggled...I wish her bad luck (:P)...not that it is going to work...but she honestly had a superior air to her just because she was a senior...come on...I probably have ten times more experience than her...and still she had the nerve to...Umm-hmmm!!!
Anyways...that is about it! Obviously, I feel much better but I wanted to mention that initially I started to justify myself since I had a lot of 10-week courses so my first 4-6 weeks would be free...but that is when I realized that I need not to! :)
Any comments? Maybe, I am overreacting but honestly since I didn't say anything so I am rationlizing it and came up with this! :)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
hey i did read up on ur posts, i must say i really liked the way u express what you feel, i never thought girls express themselves pretty much (like what they think) (no offense), but seriously i admired the way u judge with the amount u think & put them into words, ur philosophical in a lot of ways, well while reading as a guy i cant relate to a lot of it, but i seriously feel all girls need to read up n they shall realise that they too are goin thru the same thoughts, will follow up with the future deep insights or incidents, tc all the best
Thank you for the comment. I appreciate it. I wonder how you landed upon it. In terms of girls expressing...women have always expressed themselves and I believe especially today...when women are matching men at every step...so why would they stay behind in this? Regardless, I am surprised you can't relate to any of it since a lot of it is about men and the others are about issues both men and women deal with! :) keep in touch!
You know what .. signing up for 8 w/o even consulting anyone is rud e.. like you are the onl one who is interested in workin .. everyone is at work coz they like the work .. if not all , at least a majority of them do ..
I dont know who you are but if you wrote this blog to know other perspectives , then i wud say .. dont fill it in your head tht you are the only one who likes her work .
try to be a part of the team ..cheers!!
Whoever you are, anonymous, I did consult my boss and it is an open basis of signing up...and also it is first come-first served basis, which I mentioned in my blog. First, get the facts right and then make assumptions from next time atleast. You can't possibly imagine that I went there and just did it without anyone's knowledge. This was a group meeting and especially some people are leaving, we were asked to step up and take more responsibility. Thanks anyways, but don't be so judgemental...especially so quickly!
Post a Comment